I was sitting here doing my usual morning routine of checking email, twittering and drinking my yummy coffee as my mind began to wander (as it often does). I began to wonder why some people are selfish and others aren’t. Obviously we can come up with reasons like nature vs. nurture etc. But my bigger question I guess is why haven’t these selfish people learned how great it feels to give of yourself. What lesson “missed” them?

Being an unselfish person doesn’t seem to be that hard and it brings peace so why not choose it. Let me clarify, I am not talking about giving gifts and such. I am talking about simple things like not rushing someone off the phone, being a good listener, allowing someone to easily merge into traffic, giving someone a smile or a hug, putting in an extra $5 on the dinner bill just because, donating clothes to a charity or doing something that you’re maybe not totally comfortable with or don’t “feel” like doing but you do it to bring happiness to someone else. Now don’t get me wrong I’m not saying I am doing all of these things all of the time but I do find peace in being a giving or unselfish person. I trip out on people that don’t find the peace in doing these things. The people that say things like “whats in it for me?” “I don’t feel like doing it so I’m not” or “I don’t have time for this” etc. Please don’t get it confused with not honoring yourself because I am a firm believer in saying NO. You should never do things out of guilt or b/c you feel bad or someone is trying to make you feel bad. I am not insinuating that we all be Saints. I am just trying to understand the payoff that people get by always only doing things their way. Oh and then I love that these same people want to tell you how you SHOULD be doing something, LOL. Yes, pay attention, its always the “selfish” people that want to thrust their ways upon you.

A friend giving you advice or bringing something to your attention because they care is great. I am talking about that person that almost angrily tells you how you should be living your life. Its usually someone who has no life of their own in addition to being selfish. So I guess I am trying to play psychotherapist here. I am trying to understand the “why”. I would love to hear your thoughts! I dont feel that these selfish people are “bad people” I just want to know why they are like this, whats the pay off? I believe if they learned how to become less selfish they would have more peace. See, its a win win situation. Being a little selfish at different times in your life is a good thing. I am just saying living your life like this at all times is very damaging to the spirit, your own and others.

Here is a quote I love!!
Generosity is giving more than you can, and Pride is taking less than you need ~ I forget who said this